First Swim Day

We didn't get the pool until late last summer when we realized, oh my gosh it's way too hot. This year we decided to put it up as early as possible so that the heat can gradually warm it up. Then, when we do have that blistering hot day, the water won't still be frigid. The water is still pretty cold but Megan still wanted to swim and didn't want to get out, teeth chattering and body shakes and all. We got a lot of yard work done though and she loved it! Our yard is really coming together and I can't wait to post the final pictures!

Mommies Have Tantrums Too

I don't have any pictures tonight, only thoughts of what have I done wrong, and why does she do this to us? We are going on 3 hours of a tantrum of which we are determined to win. And what does winning mean? That we will not give in and rock her back to sleep and sing her another 100 renditions of twinkle, twinkle little star. We have spanked, we have given hot sauce, we have yelled, we have kissed, we have whispered, we have told her about what awaits her tomorrow if she goes to sleep like a good girl. Every time we spank her, of course we feel horrible about it and every time we spank we are reminded that it does not work, along with the hot sauce, along with time outs, along with everything else we have tried to discipline our strong willed daughter. Nothing makes a dent, she will continue to scream until some negotiation turns in her favor or she finally....FINALLY gives up which doesn't happen all that often.

As I listen to her scream, the frustration builds because not only is SHE tired and cranky, so are we. I try to remember the good things - that she is healthy enough to scream, determined enough to fight and secure enough to know that we will not ever give up on her and mom and dad still ARE in the next room listening to her screaming.

In these moments we always think about what if we had another baby. Mostly the thought is, "If we can't control this one, what business do we have having another one?" Another basic thought was, "What if we had another baby? There's no way he or she could sleep through this either." Then we're doubly frustrated and tired. There is no way another soul could sleep during this.

Then of course the guilt sets in about obviously not doing the right thing and handling everything the right way otherwise we probably wouldn't be in this situation. And what does this mean for the future? Are we setting a standard, giving her permission to behave this way in some way that we just can't see? WHAT are we doing wrong? Then there is also the guilt of feeling so sorry for ourselves that it is hard to remember that we are so fortunate. Here we have this beautiful, healthy girl when just down the street, our family members are facing what no parents should ever have to face and our 8 year old niece is dealing with way too much. She was told this week that she would never be able to regrow hair because she will have to be on this certain chemo for the rest of her life. Last week she had a full head of hair and today she is wearing a wig. Makes you feel tiny in comparison.

Well, our sweet, healthy baby girl has finally cried herself to sleep and it is time for mommy to try not to do the same. I guess I really don't want people to comment on all this, at least not all the warm and fuzzies about being a great mom, cause I just don't feel like it right now. Off to bed, busy day tomorrow.

BBQ at Devin's

We were invited to a BBQ at Devin's on Saturday night. After a long day of working in the yard, it was kind of nice to have dinner made for us and our kid entertained by her aunts and major crush Jon. Seriously, if you've never seen a 2 year old flirt (because who has?) you'll have to be around when Jon is around Megan. It is pretty hilarious. She gets all giddy and all of her focus is on him. Here, she is blowing some bubbles at him and then getting pushed by Kelly and Jon on the swingset. Swinging is probably her 2nd favorite thing next to Jon. We also found out this weekend that Jon made 2nd Team All-American for Lacrosse! Pretty impressive!

One Project Done!

Josh and I have been working a lot on the backyard. It is finally starting to take shape. One of our biggest projects was the river rock walkway, which, halfway through I was wondering whose bright idea it was. Oh yeah, mine. Anyway, the idea came about last summer but we didn't get too far except pluck about 1 bucket's worth of rocks from the path. It was here when we bought the house, giving a path from the patio to the shop but it was mostly just ugly because of all of the weeds that would grow, it was uneven and just plain ugly. So I thought, how hard could it be to pick up the rocks and replace them with something else. Well, as we found out, the rock was probably a foot deep, we only went about 6 inches, and probably ended up with at least a yard of river rock. We weren't sure what we were going to do with it at first but we think we have our next major project in the works because of it.

Ever since we built the raised bed, we've had leftover blocks just sitting in the yard because we didn't want to move it, only to have to move it again. We just weren't and still aren't sure what we're going to do with it. But I just had to move it so we could get a move on with everything else. So, this morning, I moved all of those stupid blocks up onto the wall (yeah 60 lbs. each - poor me) to get them out of the way. And then yes, we WILL have to move them again. But for now they are out of the way and we can start on the area where we will have a hammock and fire pit between the bed and the soon to be better planned out lawn.

Here is the new and improved walkway that once the grass grows, we can mow right over and no more ugly weeds!

Icky Worms

One of our projects in the backyard has required a lot of digging - more on that in the next post. We found that our yard contains lots and lots of worms. At first Megan was interested but not much more than that and definitely wouldn't touch them. Well, by the time we were done, all she wanted to do was find and pick up all of the worms. I finally told her to put the worms in her wheelbarrow and then we would take them to the garden. So here she is in that process.

Feeding the baby duckies!

We met Sheila, Natalie and Harrison at the Tualatin Commons to feed the duckies. The girls had a ton of fun as usual and saw lots of baby duckies. Then we walked to Mashitas for lunch and went to Jurgens Park for a little playtime before going home for naps. It was a lot of fun and the girls love seeing eachother. It's pretty cute!

Lesly

Please take a minute and read the update on Lesly's page. And in the words of Forrest Gump, "That's all I have to say about that."

http://www.caringbridge.org/visit/leslyfoster

My Mother's Day Present

While we were in Las Vegas, Tami arranged to have an amateur photographer take pictures of Megan for a Mother's Day present for me. They turned out so well, as well if not better than the "professional" ones we've had done. I'm definitely going to call her and see if she'll do 3 year pictures of Megan as well as some family shots. She took 1159 pictures that I have all of on a cd. Tami also put together a nice photo album of some of the best shots AND framed 2 8x10's for me. It was such a sweet, thoughtful present and I appreciate it so much. Thank you so much Tami! I couldn't think of a better gift!